I have been neglecting this place of inner release with much fortitude and with a clarity of mind. No, it is not because I am busy with work or having too much fun. I just don't want to blog anymore. Now that my 3 year university education has come to an end, perhaps it is time to move on from this form of exhibitionistic behaviour. I have to admit, having that 10-20 people trespassing through this ground on a daily basis is quite an exciting affair. But on the same note, I haven't quite gotten used to having people judging my actions and thoughts. My dad is the most avid reader of my blog. Should I end this blog, my deepest regret would be to lose him as my reader. I can't think of a better way for my family and dearest friends to know what I am doing and thinking 100000 miles away from home than through this sacred writing ground of mine. It is time perhaps to revert back to the good o' email and snail mail. Back to the time-consuming and more personalised form of communication. Maybe I will feel like blogging again in the near future. Or maybe I will blog with regularity from the next month. I don't know. Till I do, I will keep this place open. Afterall, it is helping me store my memories from a place I would call home if one could have 2 homes. A place I have to leave soon but will be back.... When nostalgia gets the better hold of me, this will be the place I turn to to soothe the yearning heart. Goodbye for now my trusted friend.

Opera House & CBD


Harbour Bridge

Blah! Blogger hung on me and ate my words up. Munch Munch Munch! I am going to re-write in point form.

- Children are easier to deal with than adults.
- I am working for an education services agency as a childcare worker. Will be called up anytime, anyday (7am in the morning) to work at childcare centres, after school care for teenagers and babysit at people's houses.
- I like this employer. They expect alot out of their workers but protect their workers well too.
- Experiences as a childcare worker in Singapore and Australia gave me insight into the differences between their working and early childhood systems.
- At XXX Pre-school in Singapore (a pte school), I was underpaid, paid late, not given a lunch hour and made to do tasks I was not qualified to do so. But I got along well with the senior teacher who is now the Principal of the school. She is my perpetual referee. A good one.
- I had a short stint at HoneyPot childcare which is managed by my uni's union. I was the teacher of my teacher's daughter whose parents (my teacher and his wife) are Singaporeans. How quirky.
- Now that I am employed again, I will be shopping for work clothes. Why are pants so expensive? Oh well, they will come in handy in the future.
- Australian kids are very talkative and out-spoken. They also love hugs and kisses alot.
- I am amazed none of the kids have asked me why I sound different from the others. My accent I mean. I am just glad they understand me perfectly fine although I need them to repeat their names 10 times before I get them. Damn.
- One kid asked me last thursday what is that thing on my face. I recalled my little nephew asking me the exact same question maybe 5 years ago. Both pointed to the left side of my face and asked very innocently, "what's that?". Mole bloody hell, a mole. My mei-ren (pretty woman) mole. My nephew said that it was dirt and tried to scratch it off with me laughing on my sides. I wonder why kids find moles on faces a rarity.

Ok, I have to go now. My virus scanner found a virus - WORM/VB.CC - in my computer. Down with it!

Hey Merry o' mo (Doesn't mean anything)!

I was packing my room yesterday when I found all the cards and letters I have received since I came to Sydney. Man, I felt loved and all fuzzy inside when I read through them again. There are the birthday cards from my parents every year without fail. There are the cards and letters I received when I was about to leave Singapore the first time round. There are the random letters I received throughout my stay here. And there are the cards and such from my Aussie friends.

The one's I received the first time I was about to leave for my 3 year university education were the most memorable. I still remember the departure at the Airport. My primary-secondary school friends were there, my rugby friends were there, my gymnastics girls ran to see me at the last minute (very drama! GP and Dy came running across the airport calling my name just as I was about to go though the gates. Just like in the movies), my family was there and my relatives came (nope, I didn't expect to see my uncles and aunties. I mean, I will be back in 4 months you know). I wasn't sad at all. I felt I had to come here. I didn't tell many people I was coming over for my education because I didn't know I was coming till the last minute. I also didn't wana be pulled back for anything. At that time, I was in a relationship, a long hard one. And there was enough emotions there already so I didn't wana go around announcing my departure.

As I read through the letters and cards again, I felt genuinely happy. These are words written by people who really care and love me. People whom I have grown up with. People who CAN judge me. And the words are real and filled with love. I am happy also because I know I must be doing something right in my life with friends. Friendships are very important to me. I treasure my girlfriends alot and to know that they treasure me back is something which no amount of money or studying can get. I hope to continue this dharmic cycle. Love your friends!

I feel surprisingly calm knowing that I will be leaving Australia in a couple of months. I have come to love this place and the people here. I am critical of many things here but I am critical of many other things. And usually, what I am most critical about is what I care most about. I was telling Christian the other day that I have to go back to Singapore someday because she needs me more than Australia does. Yes, Australia might be calm, democratic, free-speaking, friendly, relaxing and all things people look for in life. But it doesn't need me and I don't need it. Singapore is vulnerable, small, undemocratic politically and economically lost at the moment. And I know we can do something about it. I believe in my generation. I know we can build a better home in Singapore. Australia is too big and the people too contented. They are much more care-free but it is not what I am looking for. At least not at the moment. Maybe in a couple of years time, I might change my mind but not now, not yet.

And so my journey down under will be coming to an end soon. It has been a great one. I have fulfilled the goals I set for myself when I came. To complete my education (well, not yet as the results aren't out. Don't be surprise to hear me stay longer.), to live independently and to make Australian friends. All 3 elements have been as fulfilling as I envisioned them to be. My education was a blast. The education system here is awesome and the knowledge I gained was very satisfying. Living independently was a nice challenge. I lovex3 the freedom. But I realised that I am more like my parents than I knew myself to be. Back home, I detest cleaning and scoff at my parents' OCB cleaning habits. But over here, I realised that I am just as picky about cleanliness (well maybe not that much but much more than I expected). I detest dirty sinks, floors and toilets. I cannot stand things lying around. I am just a picky person I never knew I could be. Nice. As for my Aussie friends, they came abit later but they came nonetheless. I made awesome friends here and they make me smile and feel a part of them. I am going to miss them very much.

I am looking for my next journey in life already. Hope you are too.

PS If you are using IE to view my webpage, pardon me for the cranky html. My new webpage will be completed soon....

We went for The Sleepy Jackson concert on friday. An Aussie band from Perth. The main guy, Luke Steele (second from left), is awesome (Really can't think of a better word). His stage persona is quaint to say the least. The way he dances, the way he sings, his make-up, his hair, his clothings...... very captivating. Maybe that's why he named his band The Sleepy Jackson. Sleepy - narcotic - soporific - trance-inducing. [Brother, check them out. I will send you their music next time. You will love them too.] I want to enter his corpus callosum. I want to know how he thinks. Why he thinks the way he does and what makes him act the way he acts. I don't think I have met or known anyone who makes me feel this way. I might admire or appreciate certain characteristics of people but I rarely meet anyone whom I want to know, who interests me enough to make me wana know them, to talk to them, to find out more about them.

I am pretty anti-social. (My mum says it is because when I was young, she didn't let me interact with other kids. I just went for ballet classes, art classes, swimming classes..... and played with my mum most of the time) I don't feel the need to know people I don't need to know. The number of people I know and care to know can be counted with my fingers. I care about people but I don't feel that I need to know them. I don't really like small talks. I don't really enjoy meeting new people. Too tiring. I prefer analysing people. I like sitting quietly at parties looking at people. Seeing how they portray themselves. Hearing their conversations with other people. Judging their actions.

I am not bad at socialising. I get along fine at parties where I know no one. I have a nice smile and not so awful talking voice. I am interesting enough to think of topics offhand. But hell, I think it is tiring and boring sometimes. Sometimes, I wish I was more like my Aussie friends, able to talk to anyone about anything. But I doubt I will ever be like them. I prefer my intimate relationships. My single dates where there is no group dynamics to worry about. My conversations about anything under the sun with those few friends whom I love and who love me back just as much.

Anyway, back to Luke Steele, he made me change my mind for the moment. When I was watching him perform, I felt like I wana know people. I wana make new friends. I wana meet more people like him. I found this courage in me to venture out and be friendly. But it might be a momentary thing. As for now, I like him and his band enough to immerse myself into their music and ideals (my ideals maybe).


Paddington Town Hall

The place where they played. It was kinda weird. We were sitting on the wooden floors at the beginning and it felt like school assembly. Nostalgic.


Lee Jones

This guy is pretty good too. But his hair is too slimy and wet for my liking.


Luke Steele


Jess and me

So Christian bought the arm warmers for me (under my gentle persuasion again). I couldn't wear the pink ones and gave them to Jess. Jess was supposed to wear them to the concert but she forgot to. I made her take photos with me at home =) [They look pretty good Jess]


Fight!

Sometimes i wish all men can just show what they are really like in the beginning. All the peaches and cream in the beginning is so misleading. When time passes by, u actually put up with all these things u originally would never settle for.

Quote found here.

Hahaha.... I am amused. I am surprised someone can come up with this quote which portrays exactly what I feel about relationships. I think it goes both ways though. The female counterpart don't always portray themselves as what they are at the beginning as well. But because I am a woman, I know what the quote is saying.

We went for the Come Together Festival on Sunday. It is a festival where Australian bands come together and play. The event was held at Luna Park. I have to admit, I went for the festival mainly for the rides. I have no bloody idea who any of the bands are and frankly, not much interest to. (Ooh.... except this one guy who plays the bass guitar and is cute like Dean Roland and IS A FRIEND OF SARAH. Man, I had to act so cool when he talked to me when what I really wanted to do was to run my fingers through his messy hair.) I wasn't expecting much really. Most of my Aussie friends haven't even been to Luna Park before in their entire lives. Not to mention that they closed down for such a long time and only re-opened last year. I went expecting a Singapore Fun Fair kinda thing and just to see see look look and be able to say "I have been to Luna Park before". But boy did I have a fantastically fun day! The rides were ok, not very high G force but there were quite alot of them so we could try different ones. We took the Ferris Wheel and almost froze to death coz the wind is like how strong? The highlight of the day is this place called 'Coney Island'. Inside this place, which is pretty huge, there are all the olden days emm... entertaining tools. All the stuff are made of wood. You can slide down long slides, walk on moving planks, walk though mazes and tumble through round wooden cylinders. It was awesome. I want to go back again!


Reuben and Sarah


Jess and me


Band


Long Slide

This is inside Coney Island. The slide we took was much steeper than this and it was great!


Moving Plank

Reuben's cute and spontaneous. Always willing to try stuff =)And that is Jess behind going "Nah, not going on this one".


Squeezing Through


In Place

This thing is kinda weird. So, around 6 of you will sit in the middle of this thing. The staff will push the start button and the thing turns round and round. The thing is very polished wood so you can imagine, people will start flying off.


Out of place

WHEE!